Be like Hannah: Reflecting on My First 6 Months of Teaching & Living in Thailand

It has been said that when the fear of staying the same outweighs the fear of change, that is when we change. This was the position I found myself in as I decided to pack my life into two suitcases and boarded my one-way flight to Thailand in October of 2023.

I was twenty-two and restless. A fresh college graduate who had just completed my undergraduate degree in Italy; experiencing my first taste of foreign freedoms there had left me hungry for more. I was unsure what this life I wanted for myself looked like concretely, but I understood abstract truths about myself. I wanted to experience culture. I wanted to see a whole new side of the world. I wanted to work a job that filled me with purpose, that made me feel like I was making some small difference in the world.

These were the things I could only hope to find for myself on this exciting and daunting journey. Having been in Thailand for nearly 11 months now, I’m pleased to say that everything I had wanted for myself I have found, and the unexpected rewards have been the best of all.

Navigating New Challenges: Adapting to Life in Bangkok

Adjusting is not linear. That is what I wish at least one online article had said as I sat by myself on the floor of my Bangkok apartment, googling how long I was supposed to feel homesick for, or as I would watch the clock, fourteen hours different from back home, waiting for family to wake up so I could call and hear a familiar voice. The wisdom that all those articles imparted to me; however, I will now impart to you.

One of the best ways to adjust is to establish some kind of routine. This doesn’t mean you must follow some strict hourly regimine, but rather adopt new habits and hobbies into your new life. I began to frequent cafes and bars in my neighborhood. I took to walking around, acclimating to the new smells and sounds and shops. Through trial and error I found grocery stores I liked, places I could find a good cup of matcha, and bookstores with a suitable English selection.

My workplace also became a sort of base where I felt I could ask people the kinds of questions that feel so simple they’re almost silly (like when I could not figure out where to buy a laundry basket), and I am eternally grateful to those that offered me advice and even friendship when I was too scared to ask at all. 

Finding Comfort and Embracing Growth Through Challenges

There is, of course, the inevitability of error in trial and error, and you learn to take it in stride. I’ve taken the wrong train, gotten incredibly lost, overpaid for taxis, and completely misunderstood people as they’ve tried talking to me.

Sometimes, you’re making so many mistakes it feels as though you’re not progressing at all until, of course, you’re sitting on the train next to a young English couple struggling to navigate through the city center. I empathized with the struggle, as I had made the same mistake before and thought I should save them from further trouble. As I was explaining which line they needed to switch to at Siam, I felt a sense of pride; I understood my growth.

I remembered how nervous I was to even walk to the 7 Eleven on the corner my first day here, and here I was helping others navigate the city only a few months later. Reflecting on it now, I see all the ways I’ve grown in this short amount of time. I take a lot of pride in how capable I feel getting around this bustling city and how seamlessly I’ve managed to integrate myself into my life here.

And arguably most importantly, I recognize how acting and pushing myself through my fears and unsureness allowed me to steadily reach those peaks of adjustment and growth.

Discovering Fulfillment: Teaching and Connecting with Students

Within just a week of arriving here in Thailand, I was getting ready to begin work. To say I was nervous truly trivializes the nearly paralyzing thoughts I was experiencing.

With no concept of how this teaching experience would go, my brain imagined the worst. I was nervous they wouldn’t understand me, and I was even more nervous that I wouldn’t understand them! I was worried that they wouldn’t care at all. I think I even had dreams of walking into the classroom and having them all laugh at me.

Overcoming First-Day Teaching in Thailand Jitters

When the day finally came, I put on my bravest and most professional teacher face and walked into that first-period classroom. I was not met with laughter, but rather forty young Thai girls politely looking up at me and smiling. I couldn’t help but smile back. Though they were timid, I could tell they were not at all unwilling, and I was willing to work with that. In the beginning, they were mostly quiet.

The handful of students that were more fluent would often engage in conversation with me about myself and ask me lots of questions, and I was more than enthusiastic to answer. I could tell there was more they wanted to say but they weren’t sure how. I felt their frustration.

Building Connection with My Students in Thailand

I saw the way they laughed and spoke with their friends in the hallways and their big personalities, and I wanted them to feel as comfortable laughing and joking in English as they did in Thai. I felt as though their confidence was the biggest thing standing in the way of their fluency, and I felt determined to make them feel comfortable and confident enough to try. 

I learned all 120+ of their names, and each day, I made a point to address them and ask them simple questions about themselves. I was hoping that, at best, we would exchange some basic English and would leave both feeling mutually accomplished in our efforts.

Instead, I found that even if they didn’t have all the words, they actually wanted to tell me about their lives, their hobbies, the music they liked, and the tests they were worried about. I realized teenage girls are teenage girls everywhere, and as a former teenage girl, I could surely empathize with that. I saw that they tried harder when they talked about things they cared about, so I pushed them to talk about what they cared about.

I asked all kinds of questions (Google Translate at the ready),  and I saw them slowly start to open up. I felt so much pride and gratitude when, after a while, I wouldn’t even have to ask; they would come up to me and tell me what they did over the weekend, or show me the drawing that they had finished, or when we would commiserate together about the difficulties of math and science (hence why I teach English). I felt a kind of shift in our classroom from a place of education to a place of learning and growing. 

Reflecting on My Personal Growth in Thailand

It has been immensely rewarding to witness such personal and professional growth within myself since making the decision to move and teach in Thailand. It is exciting to know that more is to come. I am grateful each day for the challenges that have pushed me to learn.

As I make these mistakes and feel unsure of myself, I’m reminded of my students and how big and scary life often feels to them. I hope they realize that I’m learning about life right alongside them.